Enough!

When do we say "enough!"?

I am becoming more and more convinced that in our north american christian culture, the devil's main attack is through busyness, succeess, guilt, doing more, effectiveness, and many other words and thoughts that our culture would define as "the right thing" or the "better way" or "good." I'm so burdened by what I'm trying to confront and discuss, that I'm not really sure how to get these thoughts across. I know that in an earlier blog I discussed some of this, namely my guilt, but these past couple of weeks have gotten me thinking and we as followers of Christ have got to get a grip on these issues. I believe the time has come for me, for us, to say, "enough." Let me explain.

Recently a friend handed me a copy of a book entitled, "7 Practices of Effective Ministry." "This is such a great book," he said. This came just two weeks after receiving a copy of "Deep Change," another leadership book from my current interim pastor. One month before that a great, older guy in the church I attend gave me a copy of the "must read," "The Purpose Driven Church." Of course everyone I know thinks I have to read "The Purpose Driven Life." Next week some awesome people, a couple that I look up to because of their relationships with Jesus, have asked me to attend with them a conference. The conference? Something about spiritual formation and leadership. The keynote speaker? Reggie McNeal, one of the most revered speaker/writers on leadership in our current society.

My masters degree is in leadership. Its the buzzword these days I guess. Everyone wants in on the secrets to effective leadership. That seems to be the focus of most conversations happening around me, from student affairs departments at universities, to the weekly staff meeting in our pastor's office at the church.

Here's a funny thought: Jesus never asked us to become effective leaders. He asked His disciples, and I believe us as well, to "drop your nets and follow me." Follow.

I suppose leadership has its pluses. If we are going to establish effective churches that will speak to our post modern culture and raise up people that are attractive and knowledgable and have the ability to attract others to this life of the gospel, then we most likely will need a leader. And becuase of our current culture here in America, I suppose we do need a leader that is effective, can say all the right things, make the right decisions, and attract others; or get others to follow them. We want to be inspired, we want to be moved, we want to be apart of something bigger than ourselves, and for some reason, we think we need someone who is an 'effective leader' to tell us what that bigger thing is.

You see the thing is effective leaders get results. If a leader is effective, churches grow, people join in following, we are inspired and moved and become apart of something bigger than ourselves. If the leader is effective, we bring in more money, have more 'success,' make a bigger impact. And I suppose that all of that in and of itself is a good thing.

Yesterday the news broke about a pastor back home in Colorado. A leader of one of the biggest churches in the nation, for sure one of the most effective, and president of a 30 million member evangelical organization, this man was for sure revered as a very good leader. But the news yesterday morning was anything but that of success. This man has been accused of having sexual experiences with another man and buying and using methanphetimines. Now, please understand I have no idea what of all these accusations is actually true, and it does matter. However, this pastor did admit some part in all of it. And I am okay with that. In fact, I could very easily still look up to this man as a spiritual mentor or leader. He still has very good things to say that encourage me to know and follow after Christ. But these actions have gotten him in trouble, and all of a sudden he is anything but effective. He is not inspiring, he is not impactful in the 'effective' sense of the word.

And I think I like him even better because of it.

I could get into the travesty of how we in christian culutre hold our leaders up on pedastals and require perfection of them, thus setting them up for a greater fall. You see, this man is simply that: a man. A human who is cursed in this life with a sin nature. Just like everybody else. I could get into that, and maybe someday I will, but I have more to say on this busyness and effective crap right now.

Is it possible that in our striving to be effective and productive, we fall into the trap that satan has laid out for us-that of busyness? If you've read any of my earlier blogs then you know that I really struggle with this stuff. I constanly compare myself to others around me, my peers or co-workers. I see how effective youth ministries are run, and I think I need to do that for the students in my church. I feel that the job I do doesn't measure up, either to what people think it should, or what I think, and sometimes even to what God thinks. Its like I put thoughts in God's mind... which is impossible, but I do it anyways, and I figure that God must think I am an underachiever and then He must get very upset with me for being such a lazy slob when I should be 'out there' making impact in people's lives and being all effective and all that. Then I would achieve that coveted place of success. But until then I must be damned to exist and struggle through the mud and muck of guilt knowing that I am not living up to my full potential.

But now I'm wondering if busyness and the addictive need to acheive and be effective is what got this pastor into trouble? I mean, did he feel tempted to try meth because it works like a speed that could help him achieve greater accomplishments? Maybe he just was curious and has always wanted to check it out. I've always wanted to try pot. I'm just too scared-that honestly is the only reason why I haven't.

Seriously though, what if what dragged away and enticed this man to sin was really because he and those around him have been focused on the wrong things? Things like success and effective and growth and impact. In all the busyness of this man's life, is there ever a point to which he could say, without guilt and with support, "Enough!" I doubt it. Too many people were following his inspiration. He couldn't take a break; what would all those people he was responsible for do?

In my mind, that is our crime in our christian culture.

We aren't following Jesus anymore. We are trying to create big business. And to do that we have to use the tools of the world we live in like busyness and stress and effectiveness and inspiration and charisma and production and impact.

Don't you see? I see it right now. I might not tomorrow, but I do right now: Jesus didn't ask us to succeed. He didn't ask us to be effective or to learn the principles of leadership, or for that matter to create mega-churches that make huge impact on the world. Jesus asked us to follow Him. Follow Him. That's it.

And so right now I am saying enough. I've had it. I'm sick of working my tail off and staying busy, mostly to not feel guilty, but all that to be more effective or productive. I'm sick of doing all that at the cost of spending time, lots of time, in solitude and silence, on my knees or in nature with my Lord, Jesus Christ. He is asking me to follow, not to lead. Following means spending time at His feet. And if success and production and effectiveness come only by being more busy and that causes me to not spend lots of time at His feet, than I say "enough!" No more.

Jesus, may You and Your Spirit be the power and might that protect me from the devils' lies and snares. May Your Spirit relieve me of my guilt and feelings of inadequecy and underachievement. Whisper Your Truth to me. Remind me of what you want from me-and may YOU speak through me to others about what you really want from them.

You see, Jesus doesn't need me to be effective. He wants me to abide. Success is not to be what I worry for. Knowing the 7 principles of effective ministry-to hell with it-sincerely. I am not responsible for production, I shouldn't even think about it. Jesus is the vine and we are the branches. If we abide in Him, we will bear much fruit. He bears fruit in us, we don't produce.

Jesus' way was not the way of big business and mega churches. In fact, I don't really think His life could be seen in the immediate as effective. I mean, he taught and walked and discipled 12 guys, losers really, for three years. Then He died. Of course now we have the benefit of looking back and seeing how His life changed history-or rather how all of history is wrapped up in His life. But I don't think people that knew Him really saw Him as all that successful. There was nothing during His life or immediately following that showed any kind of production. Not in the way we measure it in our screwed up culture. He simply followed His Father in Heaven. May we begin to do that the way He did so faithfully.

And so I think this may be what my life is about. First of all, following Jesus. But if I have anything to say to our culture, may it be the Spirit's fruit in me, His power and might, and may it honor Jesus and our Father. And may it be regarding the enemy's plan to make us busy and stressed and effective and productive and entirely useless to the way of the Kingdom. I want to say "enough!" And I want the Holy Spirit to give us all courage to say "enough!" together so that through Him, we may begin to change this christian culture that has so blindly and so easily followed after the way of the dark world around us.

So when do we say "enough!"? Now. Right Now is the time.

So my prayer; today, may we say 'enough' and turn from the wisdom of this world and fall on our knees in rest and in prayer, learning to deeply and faithfully abide at the feet of our master Jesus, who is calling to us just as He did His disciples so many years ago: "come. Follow me."

To Him be all the glory and honor and power, Amen.